Hit Us With Your Best Shot: Photo Contest No. 4

Saturday, January 26, 2008

It's the fourth Style Invitational photo contest, and this time we're doing it a bit differently. First of all, you have four weeks, not one, to submit entries. Second, rather than tell you what to put in your picture (e.g., fruits), this time we're asking you to illustrate, any way you like, any of the following five captions with your own original photo:

I should have just stayed in bed today.

Washington, D.C.: Sister City of Xplf, Planet Zornog

Seventy-eight percent of Americans consider their pet "an equal member of the family."

Chris has never been quite like the other kids.

This is why it is important to read the directions on the package.

Here are the rules, some of them different from typical Invitational contests: Photos must be your own work and not previously published. They can be prints (no larger than 5 by 7 inches, nonreturnable), or digital photos e-mailed as attachments 1 megabyte or smaller. You may digitally alter photos as long as you don't insert copyrighted material. You must include your real name, the best e-mail address for contacting you, your postal address and the caption that goes with your photo. You may enter as many photos as you like, but please send each digital photo in a separate e-mail to losers@washpost.com, with "Week 750" in the subject line. Send prints to Style Invitational Photo Contest, The Washington Post, 1150 15th St. NW, Washington, D.C. 20071. Deadline for entries is Feb. 25; winning photos will be published sometime in March. The winner, as usual, receives the Inker, the official Style Invitational trophy. Second place gets this incredible wristwatch, actually purchased on Tiananmen Square by Longtime Loser Sarah W. Gaymon, depicting Chairman Mao waving his arm up and down once per second, Tomahawk Chop-style.

Other runners-up win their choice of a coveted Style Invitational Loser T-shirt or yearned-for Loser Mug. Honorable Mentions get one of the lusted-after Style Invitational Magnets. Contests are judged on the basis of humor and originality. All entries become the property of The Washington Post. Employees of The Washington Post, and their immediate relatives, are not eligible for prizes. Pseudonymous entries will be disqualified. This contest was suggested by Larry Yungk of Arlington. The revised title for next week's contest is by Dave Prevar; this week's Honorable Mentions name is by Kevin Dopart.

Report From Week 746

in which we asked for mottoes or tourism slogans for countries around the world: As predicted, we got loads of stuff whose theme was basically "Here's a Country We Never Heard Of." What, you want a prize for trumpeting how ignorant you are? Sorry, the 2000 election is over. (Yes, we know that some of the lands below are not independent countries.)

4. France: Visit, If You Must. (Sigh.) (Martin Bancroft, Rochester, N.Y.)

3. Burma: What Happens Here REALLY Stays Here. (Rick Haynes, Potomac)

2. the winner of the can of quite possibly genuine Possum Ding Dongs: United States: We Make the World a Warmer Place (Paul VerNooy, Hockessin, Del.)

And the Winner of the Inker

England: Lie Back and Think of Us (Tom Murphy, Bowie)

The Mis-Universe Semi-Finalists

Austria: No Kangaroos (John Alvey, Annandale, almost a First Offender -- his only other ink was in 1994)

Bermuda: Come Lose Yourself (Brendan Beary, Great Mills)

Burkina Faso: Not Your Father's Upper Volta (George Vary, Bethesda)

We need no signs
Nor shaving cream
Nor your dissent
For our regime
Burma. (Brendan Beary)

Canada: Home of the Almighty Dollar (Kevin Dopart, Washington)

China: Come Visit Your Money (Ira Allen, Bethesda)

Colombia: All It's Cracked Up to Be (Barry Koch, Catlett, Va.)

Denmark: Oh, So Nothing's Rotten in YOUR Country? (Brendan Beary)

England: We Couldn't Beat the Patriots Either (Bruce Evans, Arlington)

France: [motto writers on strike in solidarity with the truffle sorters] (Russ Taylor, Vienna)

Galapagos Islands: Guano Happens (Kevin Dopart)

Germany: It Is Not Necessary to Have a Humorous Slogan (Martin Bancroft)

Germany: Genocide Free Since 1945! (Cy Gardner, Arlington)

Greenland: Site of the 2060 Summer Olympics (J. Larry Schott, Gainesville, Fla.; Elwood Fitzner, Valley City, N.D.)

India: For More Information Press 1 (Matthew Morris, Rockville, a First Offender)

Iran: We're Gonna Party Like It's 999 (Brendan Beary)

Iran: World's Largest Non-American Theocracy (Ira Allen)

Come Visit Liechtenstein: Just Don't All Come at Once (Brendan Beary)

Mexico: A Little Less Crowded Every Day (Dan Milam, Paducah, Ky., a First Offender)

Monaco: Disneyland for Adults -- and Almost Twice as Large (Russell Beland, Springfield)

Myanmar: We Liked "Burma" Better Too, but These Guys Have Guns (Jeff Brechlin, Eagan, Minn.)

Norway: Just a Little to the Left of Sweden (Matthew Morris)

Pakistan: Heir Today, Gone Tomorrow (Steve Fahey, Kensington)

Qatar: Wish U Were Here (Barry Koch)

Tajikistan: Stan of Opportunity (Cy Gardner)

Tibet: Doormat to China (Lawrence McGuire, Waldorf)

United States: War Is Peace (Bill Moulden, Frederick)

And Last:

Bosnia: The Peaceful Land Surrounded by Nations of Murderous Thieves

Herzegovina: The Peaceful Land Surrounded by Nations of Murderous Thieves

Croatia: The Peaceful Land Surrounded by Nations of Murderous Thieves

Serbia: The Peaceful Land Surrounded by Nations of Murderous Thieves

Macedonia: The Peaceful Land Surrounded by Nations of Murderous Thieves

Montenegro: The Peaceful Land Surrounded by Nations of Murderous Thieves (Peter Metrinko, Chantilly)

Next Week: Boeing Us Silly, or Oft-Pique Air Fare